Friday, April 28, 2006

Harrowing day at the post office... I decided that it was finally time to send my mom her birthday gift (only 4 months late) and a little package off to the Barrells, and so loaded up my goodie bag with all sorts of treasures: melon choclates, juice boxes of sake, dried-baby-salmon-and-cashew snacks, dozens of tissue packages (handed out instead of flyers for advertising here), a replica ramen truck for Nolan, a replica Japanese woman for my brother, gum, candies etc, etc. I purchased my boxes, filled them up, took them to the counter, and that's when the fun began. Japanese staff want to make sure you have every opportunity to choose the option that's right for you, but when we have hit a wall as far as limited language skills go, I really just want to be told what to do. I just kept on repeating wakarimasen, daijobu? wakarimasen, daijobu. (I don't understand, OK? Anything is OK, because I don't understand.) Everthing had to be unpacked, itemized. The sake was not an allowable item. OK. Everything was repacked. Then everything had to be taken out again and weighed individually, including the 2 dozen tissue-packs. I lost it. I teared up, ran my fingers through my hair, said "Chigau, CHIGAU, Totemo muzukashi desu! I give up, it's too difficult!" I huffily stomped off, emptied the boxes into a plastic back, stomped out, kicked my bicycle, rode off to the alley near here, kicked and swore at my bicycle as I parked it, and stomped some more right up into the Heartland Cafe. Two free melon slushes and an email-check later, I feel better, if a little sheepish. I didn't want to be that gaijin girl, the one who gets angry in Japan because things are different. I mean; it's not my country, of course things aren't going to be easy... but sometimes I can't help wishing they were. All I can do is keep plowing along with my Japanese language studies.

I think my rage at being misunderstood, and constantly misunderstanding has been building up over the last few days; my visit to the hospital was a farce as I waited for a full hour and a half in the wrong hospital... when I got up to the counter, I coulnd't explain what was wrong, so I drew a graphic picture. The nurse looked quite shocked when I showed it to her. She shook her head, saying she didn't understand, so-- waiting room full of curious patients be damned, I pointed to my crotch and said kore wa itai! (this hurts!) Only then did she explain to me that I was in an ear, nose and throat hospital... the Womens Hospital was out the door and 4 meters to the left. (Thank goodness the doctor in there had studied in the US for 3 years!) And yesterday, I decided to hang out spontaneously with my friend Yoshino. As it was a spur of-the moment decision, I had just enough time to eat a tomato and a chunk of tofu for breakfast as I dashed out the door. He and I went to Naruto, walked through the art museum (scale replicas of every famous piece of art from Western Art History, the early Greeks to the Sistine chapel to Jackson Pollack... printed on metal and ceramic so that you can touch them... so weird) for about 4 hours. "What do you want to do now?" Well, I am kind of hungry... then we went to see the famous tidal whirlpools under the Naruto Bridge. Interesting, but I'm hungry. Then we went to an onsen. It wasn't even a very good one, and now I'm really hungry. It's 7:30 pm. Not willing to put off eating any longer, I suggest we go back to my apartment, I'll cook. OK... so we're on our way, then Yoshino wants to stop at Hard Off, the Japanese equivalent of Value Village. My patience is running out, I'm dizzy. I look around Hard Off for about 5 mins, then declare, "Dekita (I'm finished), I'm HUNGRY." To which Yoshino says, "You're stubborn." I can only laugh, or else I'll cry. No, I assure him, I'm not stubborn, I'm just starving... a piece of tofu and a small tomato is not enough to keep me genki for a full 8 hours. "Oh. You're on a diet." NO. I'm NOT. I didn't have TIME to EAT TODAY. Yoshino finally clues in. "Oh. I'm very sorry." He takes the oppotunity to teach me how to say "I'm hungry" in Japanese. I was so fatigued that I don't remember it.

Today is the beginning of Golden Week, a stretch of 10 days during which most people in Japan have time off. There's a big festival in the park, and as I was on my way downtown, I could hear the exciting sounds of Taiko drums and smell the delicious aromas wafting from the various food stalls. It's a beautiful day, the sun is shining and the wind is blowing, the multicoloured banners on all the bridges and lamp-posts are rippling merrily... and I'm inside in a darkened media cafe, sulking. Guess I better knock it off!

Sunday, April 23, 2006

It's just after 10 pm on Sunday night... I feel like I haven't slept in weeks. I'm not feeling too hot and tried to make it to the Women's Hospital after work, but their reception was closed, so I'll just have to come back again tomorrow. I'm a little suspicious of the hospital... I keep thinking about the scene from Lost in Translation where Scarlet Johannsen's bumped toe gets blown all out of proportion, and she has to sit through hours of x-rays and consults and nonsense... I'm not even all that unwell, but the Women's Hospital is the easiest place to find an English speaking doctor; or so I'm told. I just don't want to be late for work tomorrow.

Last night the dinner party was a success, or so Joanna tells me; I was on such a stress-high that I kinda zoomed through the whole event. I made enough food for an army, and now have pounds of guacamole and (semi-fresh) salsa loitering in my fridge. Salsa with eggs, salsa sanwiches... my students are going to love the halo of garlic scent that wafts in with Endrene-Sensei tomorrow. The dinner itself was pretty good; Bubu's wife Haruko said that she had "never had taste like it before"... actually, neither had I. I couldn't find any taco shells, and had to use those gummy rice-paper wraps in their stead! I don't reccomend it very highly. About 10 people including Joanna and myself ate the meal together, including a large Buddhist Bishop who spent most of the evening relaying mildly interesting puns to me (for example, the English word 'synchronicity' when pronounced with a Japanese accent, sounds exactly like the Japanese word for 'Old Chinese Man'. Wow, eh?). Most everyone could speak a little English, and so Joanna was bobarded with questions. I was mostly off the hook, although Bubu couldn't always understand "England" English, and had to ask me to repeat what Joanna had just said in "Canadian" English. Anyway, Bubu's family and friends took to Joanna like I have; she's lovely and a very relaxing presence, which is funny, becasue yesterday was her first full day of work-- it ought to be me relaxing her! She already has one student she refers to as 'The Wall'-- a girl who hangs about Nova all day, and never says a thing, just stares off into space... I think every school in the world has got to have one of those.

In he past week I've learned about the limits of Japanese customer service; everyone is dedicated to your happiness up to the point of the sale; after that, it's your problem. I took some of my earnings from my last paycheck to buy myself a nice necklace. I've never spent much on jewelry for myself before. I shopped at Ikeda, the jewelry store downstairs from my Nova. The purchasing experience was brilliant; everyone in the store fluttered about me: You are the Moths! I am the Flame! Burn Your Wings on My Stunning Presence! I was quite happy with my purchase, and wore it for the day. When I got home, before I went to bed, I stopped to admire it in the mirror once more before bed and discovered a kink I hadn't noticed in the store. "No big deal, " I told myself, "I'll just exchange it tomorrow." Well, the next day when I walked into the store with the necklace in the bag, you would have thought that I had waltzed in to take a crap on the rug; the expressions of horror and distaste that I could be so bold as to want an exchange or refund for damaged goods... I didnn't get an exchange. I didn't get a refund. I did get a whole lot of burning fury. I left politely enough; packed up my little bag, and left the store serenely. Then I stomped up to Nova and had a cry about it, while Tomomi did her best to call customer service and find out what could be done, which was nothing. Like I said, my purchase, my problem. After work that night, I went back down to Ikeda and quietly put the bag on the counter when no-one was looking and walked away. An expensive lesson; but at least now I know better. And no, I could not have kept the necklace and regifted it to someone else; it's a bad-karma necklace now. I don't want any of my friends or family touching the nasty thing.

Let's see... now that that's off my chest, I can give you a little summary of all my other going-ons...

I hung out with Shin, aka Temple-Boy, my psuedo language exchange partner. I had such a lovely time; he bought me ice-cream ("It's my treat to you," he said... cute!) and we tooled around the city on our bikes for about 2 hours, just enjoying the changing smells that spring is bringing in; new leaves, flowers, salty tidal air. We were pulled over by the police when we tried to escape them by noisily and too obviously turning down an alleyway (Shin's bike-light was out, which can mean a fine). I followed my friend Neil's advice, and played dumb; I didn't attempt to speak any Japanese, only allowed Shin to interpret as best he could, and politely handed over my gaijin card and bike registration. My air of cutesy bafflement seemed to work, as soon both officers were beaming and bowing and sending us on our way, telling Shin (who is half my size) to "look after her". Turned out that Shin didn't have to pay a fine; they only wanted to be sure that we weren't riding stolen bikes. We went from downtown to a riverside park to sit and try to talk; we fell into my old standby of exchanging cultural animal noises: "dogs say 'woof, woof', what do dogs say in Japan?" "'Wa, wa'." Then three police rode up on their scooters... after my second gaijin-card and bike-registration check, I was done for the night. Shin and I enthusistically waved goodbye to each other. Hard to believe that we could spend so much time together, never touching and hardly speaking. Nice to have a night free of innuendo and pointless babbling; just lots of innocent play and comfortable silences. Japan is really refreshing my childlike perspective... not that I'd ever lost it!

Went down to the river with Ash and Neil and Denise and Jon the other night to fire off a whack of fireworks. You know you're in Japan when a) you have to keep back from the water so as not to disturb the night-fishermen who are luring fish in with enormous incandescant lights b) You can hang around the field under a bridge and not worry about dangerous people or finding neeedles or crack-whores c) you can hang around under a bridge with fireworks d) you drink enough vending-machine booze to think it's a good idea to use your bike's basket and and seat-shaft as a launching area for bottle rockets and fountain fireworks...

I'm still really enjoying teaching, and all of my students. I just have to remember to have fun, and then they have fun, and then we all have fun together, and there's nothing like fun to grease the wheels of education! A bad day can easily be turned around by an enthusiastic or just plain funny student. Today I had this girl who is usually painfully quiet in a lucky man-toman lesson. We were doing one of my favorite lower-level lessons, Describing People's Faces. There's one activity wherein you have to fill in the blanks: Jed doesn't wear_____ and he has a big_____. Ideally, the student will say "Jed doesn't wear glasses, and he has a big beard", but the picture of Jed is pretty funny, and I've been dying for a student to say that Jed has a big something else... today I got my wish! She innocently enough tapped the picture and reported that he had a "biiiiig head" and couldn't understand when I started cracking up. It was just what I needed!

I've also been painting in the park with my friend Yoshino, and was lucky enough to see a group of college student practcing their awa dancing in the park... the Awa Odori is an enormous festival in the summer, just mad days of dancing, dancing, dancing, music, music, music. Apparently it's one of the most famous festivals in Japan; but I don't know if the dancers could look as cool in their kimonos and yucatas as they did that day in the park in their skin-tight jeans and stylish hair. One guy in particular was such a striking dancer that I marched up to him during a break in the dancing and asked him to pose for me so I could take a picture. Sheer asian-gothic gorgeousness...

inspiration is everywhere!!

Namaste

Endrene

Monday, April 17, 2006

Today I'm trying a new internet locale called The Heartland Cafe. It's quite intruiging, and really says alot about the Japanese obsession with privacy. The cafe is quite huge and quiet; when I entered, all I could see were racks of manga and graphic novels and dvds to the ceiling. No-one seemed to be about, but a hostess emerged from behind a curtain. I began in my usual way, "gomen ne, watashi... nihongo... sukoshi desu," (tranlation: Sorry-me-Japanese-little) and she was quick to say, "Oh, is it first time?" Yes, indeed. First time. She quickly registered me and pointed me in the direction of my booth; behind the racks of books and movies there was a deep stretch of little individual media-rooms. Mine is about 4' X 5', I have a big leather chair, a lamp, a dvd player, headphones, slippers... and free coffee. All of this for 105 yen for every 15 minutes.

Privacy is taken to extremes here-- I have yet to see a clear-glass window at street level. Every entrance is a door within a door within a door. Japan is a world of sliding secrets and veiled implications. I love it.

Ahhh... some good news. My room-mate is a dream. She's quite intelligent and funny, also a creative soul (journalism was her major at university) and she seems to have her head on straight. Joanna, I know you'll read my blog eventually, so let me say this to you here: THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU! She's from Newcastle, and has a bit of a Scottish lilt to her accent, which is quite pleasant. My first impression when I saw her at the train station was utter relief... "Oh, you're normal!" I exclaimed. She must have wondered what she was getting into... Anyway, everyone here at Nova is happy to have her. She's off doing her training in Osaka right now, so I have the place to myself again for a few days, which is nice, especially since there's no dread attached with her re-appearance.

Now for some strange things I have encountered and found the answers for: 1) Why do some Japanese guys grow one pinky-finger-nail long? Norm's response to this was, "You wouldn't ask a Canadian guy why he has a mullet." True, but I needed to know, so I asked Bubu-san, who told me that it was in part for 'fashion' (hence the equation with mullets), and also for practical reasons-- the one long fingernail can be used to peel the wrappings elegantly off of expensive cigars. 2) Why do people put bottles of water at either side of the end of their driveways? At first I thought it might be to keep bad spirits away; businesses frequently put bowls of salt on either side of their entrance doors for this purpose. The truth turned out to be much stranger; at the end of university, all of the students who kept cats as pets routinely "set them free" (which seems terribly cruel to me) and the cats run amok in the neighborhoods, using gardens as toilets and what-not. So, apparently bottled water scares cats away. I'm not sure of the reasoning behind this. 3) Why do the statues of tanuki (racoons... but they look more like obese bears wearing funny hats) have such enormous testicles? Ume said that the tanuki is a famous shape-shifting spirit who is lucky, but also a trickster; he can change into a man and convince other men to get drunk and spend all of their money on booze, so that tanuki never has to pay for himself. (We all know one or two tanukis, don't we?) Anyway, that was very interesting, but it didn't answer my question, so I approached Bubu-san again. First, he declared me a skebe (pervert) for asking, and then explained that testicles are a man's gold. Yes, gold. So, I don't really get that one either, but you can only take a query so far...

All is well with work and life; I'll be hiking a stone-buddah trail with my friend Brian on thursday, teaching an art lesson on friday, and cooking dinner for Bubu's extended family on saturday (send all of your positive cooking vibes my way; I've never prepared food for so many people).

Keep well, stay happy,

Endrene

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Finally... I've had some time off. Dan and Maz have returned from Australia, and things have returned to their 'normal' pace at Nova Fuji Gran. It's a funny place to work; the 'classrooms' are glass boxes about 7'X10' in size each, and there are four of them in a row. Both Maz and I dread having a class at the same time as Jon, especially if we are right next to his class, because he has this incredibly resonant voice that bounces and clatters into the adjacent rooms... this can be really difficult if you're stuck with the sort of students who are unwilling to speak up. I try not to get too bothered about it; it's not Jon's fault, and besides, it makes the conversations more realistic. If any of these students travel overseas, they're going to have to speak up.

Speaking of students... I had what we call a 'Lucky Man-to-man' (an unpaid-for one-on-one lesson) with one of my favorite students, S, last week. He really tries hard and is very genuine, and tries to make the lesson relevant. However, he can be pretty random when he's in a group lesson, and can easily side-track the lesson with strange questions. So, I was happy to have him alone, so he could be as random as he wanted, and I could answer all of his questions-- didn't hurt that he's cute, too. Things quickly went on a strange tangent (we were supposed to be discussing Superstitions) as he complimented me on my jewelry. "Hmm. You always wearing big necklaces... can I buy for my girlfriend?" I was baffled at first, but yes, he did indeed want to by my necklace right off of me then and there. I told him no, but if I saw any similar necklaces on sale in Tokushima, I would tell him where to go. Now, S., what do you think it means when a black cat crosses your path? "Ahhh. I have a wish. Can I ask it you? Can I touch your hand?" Uhhhhh... My cheeks flushed and my blood ran cold... that was the kind of stuff that I'd heard that Nova teachers could get fired for, and I quickly explained to S. that I am his teacher and he is my student and... Anyway, he looked sorta crestfallen and my nerves were jangling for the rest of the lesson; even lucky number seven and why it's bad luck to cut your toenails after midnight couldn't resurrect the good vibes. Not that I'm complaining... I've got proof that I'm a sexy teacher!

Last week I indulged in a flurry of free-time fun, happy to finally have two days off in a row I turned two into 5 nights of footloose fantasy. On Wednesday evening I met with Neil (USA) and Ash (Australia-- both work at the other Nova) for Yaki Tori (meat on a stick) at the one restaurant that I have consistently patronized (other than Big Brother's of course). One beer led to another, and I-- filled with the joyous prospect of sleeping in the next morning-- talked Ash into going out with me. He's a really cool guy; he has a good sense of humor and is at the same time very prescise and meticulous. His girlfriend is a model in Osaka; she used to live in my apartment. ANYWAY-- we proceeded to Ingrid's for karaoke. I launched into my usual limited repetoire when a group of road-tripping guys from Kobe (actually from Australia, the US and Scotland) showed up and took the bar over. One guy, who I only know now as The Devil --red eyes, pointy orange beard-- what else was I going to call him?-- proceeded to balance chairs on his head, do handstands, and moon his miniscule audience. In the middle of one of my Madonna songs, he cornered me and began to berate me for not doing more with my musical talent (ha!) which eventually led to a heated debate about art and the validity of sexually graphic art as art-- he turned out to be just another art-school graduate with nothing but sex on his mind. Nothing new there! At some point I decided that I wanted to dance and everyone had to come along to Hop (my new-found teensy-weensy dance club). I couldn't remember how to get there, so poor Ash had to lead the way. Thank goodness he stayed on, since once we were in the club The Devil wreaked havoc; dancing like a dervish, stealing my eyeglasses, making out with a Japanese girl in the corner... Ash managed to get my glasses back, and get his coat out from under The Devil and his new girl, and safely steer us both out of the club. I think it'll be a while before I go back there.

Thursday I spent the day recovering. Friday saw me hale and hearty again, so I followed Bubu's directions to the Nagao art shop-- a steamy little store about one-tenth the size of the Opus art store I worked at in Langley. It was packed to the rafters with all manner of supplies, and all in a miniscule scale. I spent about 7500 yen to get enough acrylic paint to maybe do two or three small paintings, and headed downtown to Tokushima City park to observe the hanami and paint the revelers. Once I arrived I was in awe-- the park was just filled with foamy pale-pink trees, and giant blue tarps spread out on the grass. Most of the partying starts more towards dusk, and the day was still bright and clear, so there were only a few busy picnic sites. I settled down facing one of them with my back against a tree and set up my supplies. I instantly became a flytrap for humanity. All sorts of folks came up to observe and practice their English or test my Japanese. I was amiable enough; a working artist will attract curious people no matter where they are, so they might as well get used to it. At one point, one of the guys who was actually in my picture came up to watch, and asked in a perfect Californian accent, "do you mind?" His name was Yuki; turned out that he had been a motorcross racer for years in the States before returning to Japan to start his own plumbing company. We chatted for a while, and he headed back to his party. People came and went, the light began to change, the air began to cool. When I finished, I decided to take my finished painting over to Yuki's group so they could see how integral they had been to my art. The painting was duly passed around, and I was invited to join; before I knew it I had a hot cup of sake in one hand and a plate full of tempura and taco yaki in the other. It grew dark as we laughed and talked about cultural differences-- I really appreciate the time the Japanese take to honor the changing of seasons. The park filled up and the floodlights lit up the cherry trees; we were a sea of night-blue laughter amid the fragrant glowing clouds of sakura... small peachy lanterns dotted the night like stars. People sang, drank, talked in loud and joyous voices. The men at Yuki's party repeatedly tried to buy my painting, but I refused-- I could already tell that it had solid, priceless memory value. I kicked off my shoes and ran around the trees in a game of chase with a group of small boys and a teenager in an UltraMan costume. I drank more sake. The floodlights turned off. People gathered garbage, tarps-- everyone working togther, voices still humming and happy. I helped-- then went and got my bike. Tried to spin a big circle around UltraMan in a final goodbye, fell off into the gravel cutting my hands and bruising my bottom. UltraMan helped me up like a true super-hero, checked to see that i was daijobu (OK) and sent me off. Suffice it to say, I walked my bike home.

Since that last weeked, I've been filled with renewed energy and delight; I went to Ingrid's international hanami on Sunday armed with my sketchbook and made a few more friends, and made contact with a fellow named Joe who has a PhD in Fine Arts-- his first comment to me when he saw my sketches was "Pardon my language, but what the F*CK are you doing here?!" I suppose he thinks I ought to be in New York city or something, but I can't shake the feeling that I am exactly where I am supposed to be right now. Anyway, Joe put me in touch with another guy who is having a gaijin art show in Naruto in July... (Big Brothers') Norm also said that there was another person looking for international artists for a different show. Everything is progressing nicely, and it all feels natural.

Well... tonight is the night Joanna arrives, so I best get home and finish readying the house for her. I can't wait to meet her and find out what the next stage of my adventure in Japan is going to be like! I'll keep you all posted as best I can... thanks for reading!

Namaste

Endrene

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Back at the whacky keyboard at Root Down. This has been one of the busiest couple of weeks ever; we're really shortstaffed and I have been working full shifts non-stop... 10 days in a row and counting. I'm not whining... much. OK, yes I am. I'm tired! I want to go to a hanna-mi party (cherry blossom viewing)! I want to sleep in and then hang out for a whole day in my jammies! Ahhh. Venting complete. On the plus side, I am healthy, I love my job, and the weather has been pretty good. And obviously, I am not too tired to go out to the bar! Tonight is Ken's goodbye party. He's going back to Tasmania. It's too bad, I didn't get to know him very well. But he did sell me his stereo for cheap, so I can't help but be thankful for him!

Since I'm woefully behind on the updates, I'll fill you in via (somewhat) brief point-form.

* My new room-mate, Joanna, arrives from England on the 13th of April. I don't know anything about her, and I'm a little nervous.

* Ume's visit was a blast. I found out how to say Screw Off in Japanese; two versions, the polite, and the not-so-polite. Unfortunately, I don't remember either one. I also just learned that when I thought I was saying "nevermind," I was saying "danger". No wonder my kinder kids looked so scared... Ume also taught me about the whole ummm... size-issue thing. You know, the rumor about small Asian packages? Apparently, the reciprocal Japanese belief is that they are smaller, but much firmer. (!) Which seems to be the case with all packaged goods in Japan, now that I think about it.

* My bike was confiscated from in front of the train station and carted away to a bike impound the last time I blogged... whilst I was blogging, in fact. This resulted in a taxi ride to an unfamiliar part of town, finding the scary bike-barn, paying a fine to the scary man, and getting a scary scolding for parking illegally. Then I continued from there along the base of Mt Bizan to find my way home, and had a thoroughly good adventure. I visited many shrines and temples and cemetaries. I stopped at one with a Kitsune shrine (the fox-woman spirit) and as I was leaving, was approached by a (nice, polite) young guy. He's now kinda my unofficial language exchange partner; we text-message each other regularly. He's learning more English than I am Japanese.

* I went to Bubu' s house for dinner (the Okonomiyaki guy)... it was wonderful! Many women were there, Bubu being a kinda comical patriarch for the young university students that come to his shop. He did a 'fortune telling' for me. I am an Intelligent Ape. He is an Elegant Cheetah. Another girl was a Strange Pegasus... Yeah. I don't get it either! Anyway, we ate do-it-yourself sushi and tempura and drank beer until we were all satisfied. Bubu's wife and a couple of the girls wanted to touch my hair, so I let them. This prompted Bubu to ask if he could touch a couple of other things... you can guess what! My friend Norm says that you can take the nicest Japanese man, get him drunk, and then all he wants to do is touch boobies. I've found what works best is just to excalaim, "Yeah! They ARE big, aren't they!" and this seems to embarass them into submission. Anyway, no harm, no foul, and no booby-touching.

* I have a couple of great new routes to and from work-- much safer, and more scenic. I can see the changes in the fields and the ...

OK. I'm being coerced off of the computer; Jon wants to use it. Besides, I did say 'point form' didn't I? Until I have a day off...

Namaste

Endrene